In my experience, it absolutely is the case and exactly what these people (men, because let's face it, the people who do this are pretty much universally men) mean. I read a story just the other day, which unfortunately I can't now find again, whose sole theme was that women don't have to be perfect in order for our needs to be addressed. The woman who wrote that did so because she sees the same thing that I do - plenty of men who have no problem at all saying that women need to shut up about rape culture, about pervasive violence, about continuing discrimination because women aren't perfect and until they are, they have no standing to speak or ask for better. They aren't trying to help find a solution together - they are trying to shut us up.

Is it because they are psychopaths? Probably not. They just live in a dog-eat-dog culture where the only way that is imagined to win is at someone else's expense. So, any type of greater equality, or care for the needs of someone else feels like a loss to them. I have never once seen this said in a way that could even remotely be construed as being in support of anything but solidifying patriarchy.